A Shot Across the Bow Lyrics


“Old Dun Cow”
“The Sailor’s Prayer (I Will Not Lie Me Down)”
“The Scotsman”
“Time Flyes When You’re Havin’ Rum”

Old Dun Cow

Well me and Brown in a public house
Was playing dominoes one night
When in through the door a fireman came
His face all chalky white.
“What’s up”, says Brown, “Have you seen a ghost,
Have you seen your Aunt Mariah?”
“Me Aunt Mariah be buggered!”, says he,
“The bleedin’ pub’s on fire!”

Chorus:
And there was Brown upside down
Lappin’ up the whiskey on the floor.
“Booze, booze!” The firemen cried
As they came knockin’ at the door
Oh don’t let ’em in ‘til it’s all drunk up
Somebody shouted MacIntyre! (“MACINTYRE!”)
And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk
When the Old Dun Cow caught fire.

“Oh well,” says Brown, “What a bit of luck.
Everybody follow me.
And it’s down to the cellar if the fire’s not there
And we’ll have a grand old spree.”
So we all went down with good old Brown
The booze we could not miss
And we hadn’t been there ten minutes or more
‘Til we were quite like this…

Chorus

Then Jim wandered over to the port wine tub
He gave it a few hard knocks
Then he started takin’ off his pantaloons
Likewise his shoes and socks.
“Oh no, ” says I, “that ain’t allowed,
Ya can’t be doin’ that down here.
Don’t go washin’ out your trousers in the port wine tub
When we got Natty Boh beer!”

Chorus

And then there came through a secret door
The Vicar of the local church.
And when he saw our drunken ways,
He began to scream and curse.
“You drunken sods! You heathen clods!
You’ve taken to a drunken spree!
And you drank up all the Benedictine brandy
And you didn’t leave a drop for me!”

Chorus

And then there came a mighty crash
Half the bloody roof gave way
We were almost drowned by the firemen’s hose
But still we were gonna stay.
So we got some tacks and some old wet sacks
We nailed ourselves inside
And we sat there drinkin’ the finest black rum
‘Til we were bleary-eyed…

Chorus

Well, later that night, when the fire was out
We came up from below.
Our booze was drunk, our pub was burned,
Our spirits were quite low…
“Just wait”, said Brown, as he checked his watch
By the embers of the dyin’ fire
“We better get down to Murphy’s Pub,
It closes on the hour!”

Chorus

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The Sailor’s Prayer (I Will Not Lie Me Down)
Music and lyrics by Rod MacDonald

Though my sails be torn and tattered
And my mast be turned about
Though the night wind chill me to my very soul
Though the salt spray sting my eyes
And the stars no light provide
Give me just another morning light to hold

Chorus
I will not lie me down, this rain a-ragin’
I will not lie me down in such a storm
Though this night be unblessed, I shall not take my rest
Until I reach another shore

Though the only water left be but salt to wound my thirst
I will drink the rain that falls so steady down
Though night’s blindness be my gift, and there be thieves upon my drift
I will thank the fog that shelters me alone

Chorus

Though my mates be drained and weary and believe their hopes are lost
There’s no need for their bones on this blackened bottom
And though Death waits off the bow, we’ll not answer to him now
We will stand and face the morning light without him

Chorus x2

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The Scotsman
Words and music by Mike Cross

Well a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked that he drunk more than his share
And on the night when he could no longer keep his feet
Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street

About that time two young and lovely girls just happened by
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
“Oh, see that sleeping Scotsman so fine and handsome built
I wonder if it’s true what they don’t wear beneath their kilts”
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
“I wonder if it’s true what they don’t wear beneath their kilts”

They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as can be
And lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And what they beheld before their eyes, beneath his Scottish skirt
Why, nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
Nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

They marveled for a moment, then one said, “I must be gone
Let’s leave a present for our friend, before we move along”
As a gift they left their blue silk ribbon, tied into a bow
Around the bonnie star the Scot’s kilt did lift and show
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
Around the bonnie star the Scot’s kilt did lift and show

The Scotsman woke to nature’s call and stumbled towards a tree
He lifted up his kilt and he gawks at what he sees
And in a startled voice he says, “What’s before me eyes
“O lad I don’t know where ye been, but I see ye won first prize!”
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
“O lad I don’t know where ye been, but I see ye won first prize!”

Our Scottish friend, still clad in kilt, continued down the street
He had not gone 10 yards or more when a lass he chanced to meet
She said, “I’ve heard what’s under there, now tell me, is it so?”
He said, “Reach yer hand up, Miss, if ye’d really like to know!”
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
He said, “Reach yer hand up, Miss, if ye’d really like to know!”

She reached her hand under his kilt, and much to her surprise
A smile came to the Scotsman’s face, and a strange look in his eyes
She said, “Why, sir, that’s gruesome!” And then she heard him roar
“If ye reach yer hand up once again, ye’ll find it’s gruesome more!”
Ring dum diddle diddle I de oh, ring dum diddly I oh
“Reach yer hand up once again, ye’ll find it’s gruesome more!”

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Time Flyes When You’re Havin’ Rum
Lyrics © Steve Boehm. Tune © Steve Boehm and Jim Everett. Arrangement by Jim Everett.

No future was there in London for a poor man’s son like me
So I left my home and went to seek my fortune on the sea
I signed aboard a merchant ship bound for the West Indies
And six weeks out we tacked into the winds of pyracy

There were sails on the horizon, and we tried to make a run
And when we saw that black flag, then our runnin’ it was done
And when those pyrates boarded us, they told us one by one
“You can die or join our crew, me boys, time flyes when you’re havin’ rum!”

Chorus
Time flyes when you’re havin’ rum, me boys, time flyes when you’re havin’ rum
When you’re sailin’ under the black flag, and you’re firin’ all your guns
When you take a Spanish treasure ship, you divide by the rule of thumb
The voyage’ll be over soon enough, time flyes when you’re havin’ rum

With a pistol to my forehead, then my choice was all too clear
I took leave of that merchant ship and became a buccaneer
And though they spared my life, I think that if the truth be told
I joined them for the promise of adventure, rum, and gold

The quartermaster handed me a cutlass and a gun
And as I signed their articles, the captain told me, “Son,
Us gentlemen o’ fortune live life fast ’n’ on the run
So step right up and takes your share, time flyes when you’re havin’ rum!”

Chorus

For two long years I sailed with them around the Spanish Main
And we captured ships from Portugal, from England, France, and Spain
And we took what we could and we gave none back, for that’s the pyrates’ code
And the wake we left in the Caribbean Sea ran red with blood

Now the admiralty in London sent a fleet to hunt us down
And a traitor in Port Royale told them where we could be found
They surrounded us in Nassau, the captain shouted, “Let ’em come!
The fight’ll be over soon enough, times flyes when you’re havin’ rum!”

Chorus

We ran the red flag up and then we readied all our guns
No quarter would we give, and in return expected none
We got off one good broadside but outnumbered 10 to 1
They took out half our crew and then our pyrating was done

They took us back to London town under key and lock
And the hangman’s noose was swingin’ at the Execution Dock
The captain turned ’n’ said to me, “We had fine sailin’, son,
The voyage it was over all too soon, time flyes when you’re havin’ rum!”

Chorus

(Slower)
Now as you listen to this tale, by now, I’m sure you have surmised
That I slipped the hangman’s cable and escaped him with my life
But how I got away, well that’s another story, son
(Faster)
My voyages they aren’t over yet, time flyes when you’re havin’ rum!

Chorus x2

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