Ninjas vs. Pirates and Pirates vs Earthquakes

Bilge rats, scallywags, harlots…lend me your eyes! Or, as in the case of Mike, your eye.

…Do you like my new sophisticated writing? Teach was kind enough to give me some lessons in something called literacy, so at least now I can pretend to be a scholar every so often! You know…when being scholarly seems exciting. Skippy insists that it's not boring, however I've found that my eyes tend to glaze over and I start thinking about shinies whenever he tries to explain whatever it is he used to do.

But I digress.

Let me first remind you all of the “Pirates for Hispaniola” charity pub sing at Piratz Tavern this Saturday, the 6th of March, beginning at 7:00PM. Hours of music, mayhem and not being able to move 3 steps without running into a maritime asset relocation specialist for only a suggested donation to Haiti relief. Bloody hell, a large gathering of pirates being charitable?! You should come solel

y for the fact that it may be a once-in-a-lifetime observance!

Following that, on Sunday, March 7th, we pirates do battle with our (apparently) mortal enemies: the ninjas! From 1:30 to 4:00PM, ninja clans and pirate fleets will descend upon the National Mall in Washington D.C. to wage all-out war! With some kind of game tournaments. Either way, all pirates and, I cannot believe I'm saying this, all ninjas are welcome… Also, for some reason there's a no-weapons policy. Because apparently they think that hundreds of pirates and ninjas wielding katanas and pistols in the center of a bloody tourist hotspot is a BAD IDEA. Can't imagine why… Anyway, all the information you need is here (aside from the date, since it was changed to the 7th due to the bleeding Snowpocalypse): Pirates vs. Ninjas.

Hmph. As if we don't know who's going to win.